We live in a world with billions of people, each with different likes, dislikes and opinions. So naturally it only makes sense there would be variations as to what right or wrong should be.
For instance, in some countries it is culturally accepted for an underage child to be “sold” and engage in sex. Some believe there is nothing unconventional about a man taking his wife’s last name upon getting married; or he may have more than one wives altogether. And of course, in places like Scotland, Middle East and Africa some men unashamedly wear skirts. This is simply what these cultures have grown to accept and for the most part have not strayed from it.
However, the same principle does not generally apply to the rest of the world. While some cultures will resiliently stick to their traditional beliefs and way of life, others will consistently sway. And this will all be based on peer pressure, influences, emotions, and lack of greater knowledge. Together these people all represent humanity. Follows are 10 things humanity still can’t make up its mind about.
#10. Who pays on the first date
A man asks a woman out on a date. No, wait. This is 2020. Anyone should be able to ask anyone out on a date. So two people are dining at a restaurant and having a fabulous time till the check finally arrives and the bill reads $2000. Then the awkward frolicking begins! Both parties pretend to reach for a purse or wallet while hoping that the other gets to it first. In some cases only one person tries to reach for anything while the other looks on with a dark expression and folded arms.
There’s also the possibility that both persons would show fake smiles and force themselves to say, “I’ll get it” followed by “No, let me get it.” And in more extreme cases someone will suddenly feel like heading to the bathroom for a “window break.” Seriously? Tricking or guilt-tripping someone into paying the bill with lines like, “It’s the manly thing to do” or “real women will offer to pay too” just is not conducive to genuineness and free will. And it certainly does not correlate with modernity or equality.
Yes, splitting the bill could be an option but at the end of the day the decision should be yours. But consider if you are expecting someone you just met to automatically cover your food expenses then you probably should not be dating in the first place.
#9. When it’s okay to be single
All your family and friends—even all the pigeons and dolphins—seem to either be married or in a committed relationship. And you’re left wondering why you were single at 16. More so, at 26 and as you approach 36 you’ve started considering what the rest of your life could be like if you were to forever spend it alone.
Only the happy couples don’t seem to share your sentiments as they try to convince you that you simply have not yet found Mr. or Miss. Right. Yet, despite their condolences you just can’t seem to shake that hint of pity some people seem to give you when they find out you’re not seeing anyone. The “Awwww, you poor thing” mixed with a “Don’t give up” kind of feeling. Both may could cause you to wonder if it’s really okay to be single.
To set the record straight, forget all of the following when considering if you should be riding solo: the media, people’s opinions and your biological clock. Also forget any quote from the Bible that might be conveniently used or abused; expect this from someone whose objective is to try to convince you why you should not be single. Remember, at the end of the day it’s your life to live. And if you’re not happy as an individual then you’re unlikely to make someone else happy.
#8. How did we get here / what happens after we die?
This is a tricky one that’s synonymous with what’s the meaning of life. Some parents tell their children, “We were dropped from the skies by storks”. Others are more straightforward and will tell them exactly where babies really come from.
But of course it gets deeper. If the truth is that we all came out of our mothers’ wombs then does that mean that mothers were the only ones who are dropped from the skies by storks? So then where did the storks come from? Immediately the Bible comes to mind—particularly that renowned story about Noah and the ark. But wait, what if there was never really an ark and was all just a fairytale? What if the entire universe was truly created by some grand, cosmological model that miraculously expanded to create everything with a BIG BANG?
But then it gets even more complicated. Even if we were certain how we came to be alive on this earth it still does not automatically answer what happens after we die. Do we go to a place called Hell or Heaven? Do we resurrect in the same or different body here on earth? Does our spirit go to some secret nirvana or do we simply just die? Questions upon questions. Everyone may believe something different. But the only way we could know where we’ll be going is by finding out, undoubtedly, where we came from.
#7. What to wear
Boys wear pants and girls wear skirts. You have been warned. Make such a statement in today’s society at your own risk. Once upon a time it was almost mandatory that one wore what was expected in order to fit into society. Things have changed since then, but then again not so much. Depending on the time, place, event and era, your pants still can’t be too loose or too tight; your skirt can’t be too long or too short. And wearing the wrong shoe, tie or hat can either make you seem trendy or out of the loop.
And as though having to worry about length, width, style and brand isn’t enough you sometimes have to worry about what colors would appeal to people’s emotions and coincide with expected protocol too. Simply put, the whole affair of deciding what to wear is based on a mishmash of opinions, morals and beliefs; everyone could never entirely agree on these.
Some people would simply not care and would wear what they feel; but they would often be considered to be too “different” or outcasts by society. For everyone else, what to wear will always be a question you usually ask yourself (or someone else). Because you could never be too sure who you would please or offend based on the way you look.
#6. Which foods are good for you
“2012: Scientists have discovered that peanuts can make you fat.”
“2013: Scientists have discovered that peanuts are good for weight loss.”
“2014: Wait! Scientists have discovered that peanuts can make you fat after all.”
Curse you, scientists! Now I have to return to eating raisin bran again.
“2015: Scientists have discovered that raisin bran may not be good for you”
The above scenario may be slightly preposterous; but it does not stray that far from how things play out in reality. One minute it’s said you can eat this and the next minute you can’t eat that. Surely scientists are constantly at work and conducting new research will reveal new findings. But perhaps those who prematurely release these findings can keep them to themselves until the results are deemed conclusive.
There are a multitude of foods we eat each day that we may have been conditioned to believe are good. Then we read articles like this one and suddenly feel all confused again. However, you always have the option of going against the “healthy grain” and eating whatever you like. Studies have revealed that some people actually live longer this way. At least at the time of writing this article!
#5. The number of Gods in existence (if any)
“There is only one God and his name is Jesus. No wait, it’s Jehovah. Actually, I heard someone say it’s Buddha. But what about and Shiva and Yahweh?” Under what context can anyone consider that one or all of the above are indeed Gods?
Depending on your religion or level of spirituality, providing you believe in the concept of faith, each person will believe there is either one God, multiple Gods or no Gods. For as long as their faith is present they will continue to serve what they believe. And you would have a hard time trying to sway them from their beliefs. Not that you should. Because chances are you wouldn’t anyone to force their beliefs onto you either.
#4. The definition of a man/woman
As a child, many were probably led to believe that once they attain the age of 18 (or 21 in some places) they will automatically morph into an adult. They remain with this liberating feeling till they try walking into a bar minutes after turning 18 and is either shooed off by the bartender given a glass of milk.
Yet a male or female 17 years old, standing well over 6 feet tall with a built physique can walk into that same bar and will more likely be served without question as an adult. “Uh hmm. That’s a real man or woman right there,” some will say. “Look at that facial structure, look at that body.”
But then there are some who see a man or woman differently. They believe they are either mentally mature, independent, takes cares of their loved ones, knows how to treat the opposite sex, is confident, good at certain tasks, etc. Or perhaps all of the above, and then some! What some don’t see each man or woman to be, however, is different and imperfect. This is why one man’s trash could possibly be a woman’s treasure and vice versa.
There is no one true definition of a man or a woman; yet we are usually forced to accept that there is on based on society’s expectations. Nonetheless, if you truly need a foolproof definition that no one can dispute try this one: “A man or woman is someone who constantly aspires to learn and make a positive difference in life without requiring the approval of others.”
#3. What really happened on September 11th
Quite frankly there are many who wish they could erase Tuesday, September 11th, 2001 out of their minds forever. It was one of the most memorable events in history, arguably the most memorable of the 21st century. But certainly not for the right reasons.
On this day four passenger airliners were hijacked by al-Qaeda terrorists so they could be flown into prominent buildings in suicide attacks. Two of those planes (American Airlines Flight 11 and United Airlines Flight 175) crashed into the North and South towers of the World Trade Center complex; within two hours, both towers collapsed with debris. The resulting fires causing partial or complete collapse of all other buildings in the World Trade Center complex; ten other large surrounding structures incurred significant damage.
A third plane then crashed into the Pentagon (the headquarters of the United States Department of Defense). And a fourth plane targeted Washington, D.C. but crashed into a field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania, after its passengers tried to overcome the hijackers. It is estimated that over 3,000 people died in the attacks.
This is the story the world has been given but some claim there is much more to it. Rumors have it that the event was merely a setup by some powerful heads. It’s been said bombs were planted inside the towers to detonate in sequence as the planes crashed into the buildings. But who might have planted them?
The fact that it was also possible to fold a $20 US bill before September 11th and reveal a “secret” image of the twin towers seemingly on fire also leaves one to wonder if it really might have all been premeditated and staged. And of course there are many more opinions still floating around the Internet. Regardless of what may or may not have happened, being uncertain about September 11th does not revive the dead or help restore peace to the hearts of those who lost their loved ones on that day.
#2. Our identities
If you ask the average person to define who he/she is and where they’re going you may get diverse answers. A preschooler might state, “I’m a boy and I want to be a fireman when I grow up”; that same boy at 17 or 18 might explain why he now wants to go to law school. He might then successfully complete law school and rack up work experience in the field,. Then he may discover in his mid thirties that he wants to be a Graphic Designer.
On the flip side, a little girl who claims she wants to be an astronaut from the age of 3; thirty years later her dreams and aspirations become realized. Yet when she finally retires from her field she begins to search for a new experience and identity. Human beings aren’t meant to fulfill a single role or identity for their entire life. No one person will ever remain the same forever.
Only the experiences obtained through life can drive you to eventually discover your true identity, even if it’s temporary. Like a chameleon trying to survive in the jungle, we consistently change to suit our environment and when the environment changes we change to suit ourselves.
#1. The road to happiness
The road to happiness can either be a long or short one depending on how you view walking. Do you see yourself as a person who prefers to take big steps or small steps? Do you generally prefer to walk fast or slow? How gracefully you choose to walk is a good indicator of how happy you can ultimately end up to be. If you walk past everything in a hurry to get to your destination you may eventually get there; you may even get there before everyone else but may ultimately begin to wonder why something still feels like it’s missing.
Happy is the soul that considers that as effortless as walking appears to be it is indeed an art. And art takes time to be polished into something that is appreciative. In this instance the art is you—only you can appreciate everything that makes you happy. Health, Love, Faith and Prosperity are all things that can make most people happy. But also consider how unhappy someone else might be if they have all of these things yet the person he/she loves the most in life is terminally ill.
Some also prefer to chase after all the riches in the world; they may put them before everything and everyone else because that’s what makes them feel happy. For these people that’s fine but for someone else, money will never bring true happiness. But each person must walk a specific path in order to secure personal happiness. That path, however, is only ever as happy as much as you feel at ease. Your walks in life should always take you once step closer to finding complete and inner peace. On then will you find your happiness.
