Long ago we lived in a world where there were only two sexes: male and female, which both had one of two preferences. Either you were a man who would be romantically or sexually interested in a woman; or you were a woman who would be romantically or sexually interested in a man. It was pretty straightforward. But since the 20th century things have become a little more complicated. Now we have the battle of the sexeses!
One big, mixed-up alphabet
“Let’s see: A, B, C, D, E, F, G … H, I, J, K, … L G B Q T I A! What? Ok, wait, wait, wait! This is not your typical alphabet. There’s some new millennial sh__t happening here. We got L for Lesbians; G for Gays, B for Bisexuals; T for Transsexuals; Q for … what the hell is…?”
“Hey, you can’t say ‘what the hell’ out loud. You will offend them.”
“Excuse me. I’ll offend who?”
“The Queers.”
“What are those?”
“They’re … the strange ones. Plus there are those who question things.”
Ok so I eventually learnt that to be queer/questioning means you can be gay, bisexual, lesbian, etc. But it can also mean you don’t necessarily want to be labelled as being a particular one. You can also use the name when you’re not quite sure which one you want to be. So it can be like a softer way of saying someone is a homosexual, which is also synonymous for being gay or lesbian. But wait, it can also mean you are actually one of the others too. Well at least when you feel like it. Again … what the hell!
The Alphabet: part 2
Yes we get it, times have changed. But one would think that for so long these non-traditional communities have fought so hard for their cause that they would have at least gotten all their letters straight by now. Because let’s not forget that after LBGT comes a bunch of other letters. Yes, more letters that are only going to confuse the hell out of the average person even more.
Now I am not one to judge someone’s sexual preferences. It’s their choice and I am not God. However, there have been classic battles between the regular male and female sexes for so long; the most one may have hoped for is that after all this time things would’ve gotten simpler, except they haven’t.
First of all, after L.B.G.T there is Queer/Questioning (as was mentioned above). Follows this is Intersex (which is a male or female who happens to have both male and female sex organs or sexual characteristics). Then there is Asexual or Anonymous or even Aromantic, depending on the source.
But it gets even more interesting because there are many variations of those mentioned above. Essentially it’s expected that the terms and definitions would be constantly changing and would mean different things to different people. This is where things can get a little more serious. Change can be good but at what cost?
The cost of change
The fact that definitions continue to change over time speaks volumes. It’s okay to fight for the positive things you believe in. But you must be completely certain what it is you’re really fighting for. When Martin Luther King fought for blacks, he had a definite end goal in mind. His vision was to see an America where black and white citizens were truly equal; he wanted the same same civil rights granted to blacks.
Likewise, the LBGTQIA community has long been fighting for something similar with the exception that the community itself keeps changing. And every time the community changes, slight changes would need to be made to the ultimate end goal. This can lead to a community constantly having to fight without a true end in sight. But this particular fight for equal rights automatically creates another problem.
A fight for equal rights?
It’s okay to want equal rights, especially where humaneness is concerned. But at what point is a line to be drawn in relation to fighting for a cause? It is true that innocent, hardworking and righteous people deserve a chance to live among society. And they should be allowed to do so without discrimination. But it is also true that societies cannot always change their entire framework to accommodate minorities.
For instance, there may be millions of gays and lesbians in the world but there may be much less people who are intersexuals. Figuratively speaking, it may make more sense for societies to make drastic infrastructural changes to accommodate the gays and lesbians. But to simply acknowledge the intersexuals while accommodating each on a more individual level.
Not taking it personally
It is not about singling out any particular group. It is about understanding that every person who was “born different” cannot seamlessly fit into a global society; the world at large just cannot fully accommodate the needs of everyone.
Some may find this insensitive but it is the reality. This remains the case even for heterosexual males and females who may have to exist in this world with disabilities. Most roads have not been constructed by default to accommodate the blind. Nor are TV shows created from the get-go to appeal to those who are deaf. The needs of the majority are always catered to first. That’s just how it is.
Drawing the line
A line also needs to be drawn because with the constant changes made within the LBGTQIA community anything is expected. With the many ambiguous definitions and levels of acceptance, one can’t help but wonder what letters may appear next. Just think: under the umbrella of LBGTQIA alone there are many other sexual orientations that this article has not even touched on. Pansexual, Demisexual and Omnisexual anyone? Yeah, try not to think about it too much.
But also think about what not setting any sort of limits may eventually encourage: “Hey I love to play with little boys. I’m a Pedosexual. Include me on the list” and “Oh, don’t forget about me. That cow looks real hot. I wanna suck it. Add me too. I’m a Beastysexual … Moooooooooo!”
At the end of the day, we as a society (including the LBGTQIA communities) can continue to fight for our own causes or we can come together and do what is right for the benefit of global societies. It’s not about who wins the battle; it’s about learning how to love and respect each other … despite their differences, despite the wars.
