Should women give “it” up?

Nowadays there seems to be some very interesting perceptions about what should or should not be done between couples before marriage. These same people believe they know the truth about the whole affair. But what exactly is the truth? One very active “truth” continues to make the rounds in the media today; scores of women think they have the right to withhold particular privileges from men until they become their husbands. But should women just give “it” up?

Women’s rights and sex

“I’m not giving you any until you put a ring on it!” a woman may say. And some men may eagerly reply, “You sound as though you’re selling biscuits.” Yes, sex! sex! sex! It’s what most women likely think men want more than anything else. But the potentially shocking reality is that for most men—especially in the long term—it’s not what they actually need.

It’s been pushed into people’s minds for so long that men are just hungry (and thirsty!) sex dogs; many now think that a woman can simply wave her vagina as though it were a magic wand and get men to do what she wants. For all the men who are this feeble, shame on you! But seriously, many women need to understand that their insistence on withholding specific rights until marriage can also hold them back from finding genuine love and ultimately their future husbands.

It’s not about sex

Straight up, this article isn’t about sex. Sex is just one right that many women truly believe they should withhold until marriage. After all, a woman has the right to do what she wants with her body, within reason. Fair enough. What may not be right, however, is when the list of rights she chooses to withhold extends to include things that are pretty questionable.

For example: “Well, after you put a ring on my finger I will treat you better!” or “I’m never going to cook a single meal for you until you give me a ring!” If you are unable to see the problem with the latter statements then you are indeed part of the problem; this means you are either directly or indirectly contributing to today’s divorce rate.

When women should give “it” up

Love—genuine love—is not based on what someone can do for you. It is given freely, not manipulative and unconditional. If you cannot love in this way that’s fine; it’s understandable you need to protect yourself while being in a relationship through usage of constant logic and discernment. Therefore conditions must be set.

Nevertheless, know that the only type of love that can substantially sustain a healthy marriage in the long run is genuine love. It can’t be the type where you align an offering of good deeds akin to the equivalence of monthly bronze, silver, gold and diamond packages. E.g. your significant other can only get x number of hugs and kisses based on the awarded package.

Offering constant ultimatums and “package deals” as earned privileges not is going to keep a man invested. Even if your antics work and lead up to marriage, you may need to hope one of your packages includes the freedom for him to possibly have fun with more than one vaginas!

Again, this isn’t about sex

A lot of women still hold onto the belief that if a man gets the milk for free then there’s no reason for him to want to buy the cow. When you break this down even further, from the perspective of many men that cow philosophy can translate to, “If I don’t play mind games until I am able to bait him into marrying me then I will never get a husband.”

Once again, keep in mind this isn’t about sex; it’s the fact that a lot of men are more intuitive than many women give them credit for. To a serious man who truly respects a woman’s beliefs, she can freely keep her sex. What she cannot keep, however, are the things that will matter to him more in a marriage.

No genuine, marriage seeking man wants to marry a woman who has nothing more meaningful to offer in the long run besides sex. These men desire to see a lot of the same traits that women wish to see before marriage. Women holding onto those traits as though they are rare commodities can prove costly. Traits like Compassion, Understanding, Forgiveness, Intelligence, Honesty and Patience genuine men deserve to consistently see beforehand.

You can’t put a price on love

Think about it. What would you think about a close friend who is only willing to be extra nice to you after you pay her $500? Sound like a business transaction, doesn’t it? Many enter into marriage with the same idea. It’s as though they are proprietors who only wish to give based on what they receive.

But consider what usually happens the moment “50/50 exchanges” no longer seems profitable to the business. The business immediately makes cut backs or ultimately cuts its loses; the end result is broken relationships. In the case of monogamous couples, it leads to broken marriages. Because genuine love cannot function based on premeditated calculations and figures.

Do the right thing

If you want a genuine person to spend the rest of your life with then simply be a genuine person; being genuine will more likely help you attract what you want. But you must do so by showcasing the best you have to offer BEFORE you get married, and not after. This can easily be done without you becoming a whore to maintain a man’s interest.

Just be balanced, properly evaluate the person you are interacting with and make sensible decisions before casting your precious pearls before swine. You’ll know you’ve met the right one when you no longer feel the need to hold back from doing what’s right.